Laying out at home or at a funeral home: what's the difference?
When someone passes away, they can be laid out until the funeral at a location chosen by the deceased or their loved ones: at home, at a funeral home, or sometimes elsewhere, such as in a church. Laying out at home means the body remains in a familiar environment, usually in the bedroom or living room, so loved ones can say goodbye at their own pace. A funeral home, on the other hand, offers a controlled space with cooling, fixed visiting hours, and practical support from staff.
Both options are commonly allowed in the Netherlands and the law sets no preference. The choice mainly depends on what feels right for the deceased and their loved ones, and on practical matters such as space, climate at home, and how much time there is between passing and the funeral.
What's involved in laying out at home
Laying out at home requires more paperwork than many people expect, but with the right preparation it's manageable. The funeral director usually arranges a cooling element or a mobile cooling unit placed under the bed or bier, so the body stays well preserved even in warmer weather. Additionally, a separate room is often chosen to be temporarily set up with candles, flowers, and personal items.
How long can someone be laid out at home
In practice, a deceased person can remain at home for a few days, provided cooling is done properly and circumstances allow. The funeral director can advise on this based on the situation. For families who want to take time to say goodbye at their own pace, this is often an important reason to choose home over a center with fixed opening hours.
What makes a funeral home easier
A funeral home takes practical concerns off your hands: cooling is professionally arranged, there's a separate reception room for visitors, and staff are available to answer questions. For larger families, or when there simply isn't space at home, this is often the most practical solution. Some people also deliberately choose a center because they don't want their house to be associated with the death.
Why it's important to share your preference beforehand
Loved ones often face this choice at a time when they can barely think straight. If you've made clear beforehand what your preference is, they won't have to figure out that decision themselves during a period full of grief and practical pressure. This applies not only to laying out at home or at a funeral home, but also to smaller details: do you want music playing during visits, can people touch you, is there specific clothing you want to wear when laid out.
With PSILY you can record these wishes calmly and at your own pace, so they reach the right people at the right time. Via record your funeral wishes you describe not only burial or cremation, but also practical choices such as where you want to be laid out and who may be present. That way no one has to guess what you would have wanted.
How to record this wish concretely
There's no need to get everything perfect all at once. Start with the main points: at home or at a center, and why. Then add details such as how long you want to be laid out, what clothing you want to wear, and whether you want visits at fixed times or prefer an open house. You can keep this information in the same place as other practical documents, so your loved ones find everything together instead of scattered across loose notes and conversations they try to remember afterwards.
If you also want to safely store sensitive documents such as a policy or will alongside your funeral wishes, you can do so via store your documents encrypted. That way everything your loved ones need is in one trusted place, rather than scattered across folders, emails, and phones.
If you're not yet sure exactly how this works, here's an overview of how PSILY works a clear overview of the steps, from recording your wishes to the moment they are released. Do you run into practical questions? Then you'll find the answers on the frequently asked questions page to the things most people wonder about before they start.
Start today
You don't need to arrange everything at once. Simply start with the choice that feels clearest to you, and add what's missing later. Create a free account with PSILY and set up your first wish today, so your loved ones won't have to wonder later.